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It's Nice

from Songs of Healing by Olivia White

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lyrics

It's nice to see
I don't have to self-destruct
When I'm with you
I get confused
Is this joy mine?

But then again, when will I self-destruct again?
When will I find a way - a reason - to just fucking leave?

When I sleep and in my dreams I can't connect to myself
When I go to work and nothing that I say is myself
When I drink til I can't even remember myself
And the evening sends my spiraling against myself

When I touch myself and I can't even feel myself
When I stare at the screen to try to forget myself
When I lay in bed til I don't want to live as myself
When I'm honest I'm still running away from myself

credits

from Songs of Healing, released August 21, 2020

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Olivia White Seattle, Washington

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